[shippin up to boston]

Today has been a really mixed day. It started off really shite, got a bit better, then ended up shite again. Mostly because of my own way of dealing with things.

I woke up late, when I’m supposed to be trying to get in to work on time. I haven’t blogged about this do far, as I’ve been a little embarrassed to say it out loud. One of my peers has decided to keep score for the amount of times I’m late against the amount of times I’m actually in on time.

To make things more interesting there is also a wager involved. First to 14 buy’s lunch. So if I’m late before I’m early 14 times in a row, I buy lunch. If I’m early 14 more times that I’m late then he needs to buy me lunch. The thing is, its up on a board for all to see. I feel stupid. I know why he’s done it. He understands the way my brain works, its like shaming me into being on time for work. I don’t get any shit for being late, but its always been flexible. Until he came along. I never used to mind working on a but late, or working through lunch, but since he’s started this shit I take every break and I leave on time.

Now, what pissed me right off this morning, was I was in on time. But it was tight, I’ll admit that. But I was on time. By the time I signed in, got settled it was 10.03am. I start at 10.00am, supposed to be. So just as my arse cheeks skiffed the chair, he shrilly say’s and I quote:

‘Another late mark for you, hunny’

I felt quite annoyed by this, it was said in front of the WHOLE office – ok so there are only a few of us, but the few that were in, made comment.

I mean, I know I should be on time for work, but when its always been flexible for him to come in and just change things, in this humiliating manner is just not on. Yunno?

Time keeping was never a problem for me until I had my breakdown. Ever since then, its almost been a conscious decision to not turn up on time, or give any more of myself to that company than I need to. I don’t get paid for the extra time I put in, I don’t get paid for the extra job that I’ve been effectively doing for the last 2 years so why the hell should I? It barely pays enough to pay the monthly bills. When I raised my concerns I was told that I was ‘lucky to be in a job’ and I should just suck it up, keep my head down and get on with my work, as I was ‘very good at my job’. I agree in this climate, I am very luck to have a job, but I’d probably be better off on benefits if the truth be told.

This wasn’t intended to be a blog about work, or a ranty rant, but man, I do feel better.